A day in the life of Santa’s elf.

Dec. 24–This date comes around faster every year. There is just so fast we elfs can work and every year there are more kids to make toys for. Then we have to load the sleigh. Will it ever end? Yes, December 26th is a day of rest and then we start for next year. We outsourced to China, but their manufacturing has not been keeping up with orders and since they practically own America, they have been putting pressure on us to pay in advance.

I don’t know where Santa gets all the money to pay them. Any year now they will stop giving us credit and we have to come up with 18 trillion dollars overnight or there will be nothing but coal in all the stockings. Only problem with that, the coal miners are going on strike and there will be no coal.

Why do I worry? I don’t know, only that they call me a worry wart. Well, someone has to be concerned, we’re not all Democrats.

Ellynore Seybold-Smith

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Journal for December 16, 2014 at the North Pole

By I M Anelf, Engineering Supervisor

Those darned reindeer! They’re at it again! Every time I turn around they are getting into more mischief.

Just this morning, as I went out of the igloo to get the morning news, I saw them flying around all over the pole, their hot breath billowing out clouds of steam like an old railroad locomotive. The real problem was that they were fogging up the new windshield that Santa just had us elves make for the sleigh.

How can Santa possibly find every house where the children have been nice and hung their stockings with care when he has a fogged up windshield on his sleigh?

Danged reindeer! I guess I need to go back to the drawing board and design a sleigh windshield defroster.

John Gable

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“Whew what a day! I have just enough time to undress and get into bed,” I said to myself. But first I’m going to write in my journal.

Work started off real early this morning. The first thing I heard were the seals squawking and the reindeer clacking their antlers. All that noise woke me up. I began by putting on my red slippers with a bell on each one. Then I pulled on my green and white striped tights. I finished my ensemble with my white shirt, a red waist coat, and my pointed green felt hat.

I hurried down to the main breakfast table to join my friends who were already singing Rudolf the Reindeer and other Christmas songs. Then our boss, Santa, made an appearance to tell us of all the work that needs to be done by December 24th.

I gathered my wood working tools and electronic diagnostic tester from my locker and ran with the streaming crowd of fellow elves to the workshop. The shop was huge but divided into sections as conveyor belts moved in all directions. Each of us began making a small part then passed it on until the toy was completed for the packaging department.

This went on all day.

Goodnight for now Journal, until the same time tomorrow night.

Nancy Nation

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December 16, 2014

Dear Diary,

What a day it was at J.O.S.N. LLC. Here we are only nine days until Christmas—well we really only have eight days before Christmas Eve and that’s when Santa must make his trip around the world delivering toys to all the good little boys and girls.

I cant’s believe Delbert would do this TO ME! I thought he was my friend. What did he do someone might ask? He called together all the other elves. Those like him who are part of the lower echelon and got them to walk out.

Now I and the other twelve chief elves are left to run the toy assembly line. What a job! It’s been so long since I worked the line that I had a hard time remembering where the on and off switch was. Now, my arthritis has every joint in my legs aching. I don’t know how I’ll manage to stand there all day tomorrow and put eyes into baby doll heads.

We are going to be way behind schedule. And, it’s all because of such a silly thing—a change in the coffee in the break room.

I’m sure Santa didn’t realize when he asked me to find a cheaper brand of coffee (coffee prices have gone sky high this year) that it would cause such chaos.

I searched and researched looking for a blend similar to what we had and thought I’d found it. Who knew elves were such connoisseurs of the Starbuck’s Christmas Blend.

Morty the Elf, Manager Elfin Resources

Christine Howard