March 1, 2016 -You, Leonardo Decaprio, have just won and Oscar. That night, you are visited by your future self who gives you a dire warning.

“Leo! Wake up! I know you are hung over and sleepy-try to cut down on the partying some, would you-but wake up!”

I heard these words as I was pulled out of a very deep and dreamy sleep. “What the hell? Who are you? Where are you?”

“Leo! It’s me,-you-you twenty years from now. I have something very important to tell you, so wake up and listen.”

I sat up in bed, looking around. I didn’t see anyone. “All right, who’s got the hidden camera?”

“Hey knucklehead, you need to listen to me. Do not-DO NOT- take the next movie part that comes along. There would be consequences you can’t believe.”

“Do you think I will just take your advice? I don’t think so. What’s the name of this movie I shouldn’t be in?”

“The Revenant 2.”

Karen Hydock


Excuse me, mister. You are in my way.

No, you are in my way.

I’m Leonardo D’Caprio, the Oscar winner, the most famous
movie actor in the world. Get out of my way!

I am Leonardo D’Caprio, the poorest, most rejected
has-been in the world. I have returned from the future
to inform you not to cut your hair.

Kevin Draper