Bob changed everything!  I am a pack rat.  No, really, I am a pack rat, beady eyes, long slender tail, the works.  I have lived in the upstairs attic of a very classy vacant home in Oro Valley and have been happily undisturbed for the past three years, just living a pack rats life. Then Bob, actually Bob and Carol, come along and want to buy my home.  Ugh!

They were so excited.  Below me I could hear their irritating comments:  “Oh, look at that view Bob,” or ” I can not believe this house has been on the market three years,” or “What a steal, only 340K.”

“I’ll fix em!”

The day of the home inspection was quite a lot of fun.  My friends and I spent the evening before the big event pooping, laying waste to the insulation, bringing our crap in from the desert and even invited some termites over for a party.

You know what?  We have not seen hide nor hair of Bob or Carol.  I am at peace, once again in my vacant home in Oro Valley by the desert.

Pat Stone

A computer changed everything. I was a young and lonely soldier stationed at the Presidio Of San Francisco. My social life with the opposite sex was nil. Generations of service men passing through the city had led local parents to tell their daughters “Little Red Riding Hood” stories in which the wolf always wore olive green.

While taking a night class at a local college I came across a computer dating application. For only $3.00 and by answering just thirty questions it promised to provide the names of at least five compatible women.

A few weeks later I received a reply. It had fifteen names but as I tried to call I found phones busy, no answer or “got a boyfriend already”.

Finally I was able to connect with Mary and 45 years later we are still connected. I suspect that we may have been one of the first computer marriages and all for only $3.00

BOB KELLY